twin scars
by Riskk
Summary: Katsuki Bakugou hated explosions. (Re-edited / Published)


**hh, hey! This is my first fanfic, and I'm kind of scared to put this out here. Sorry for my shitty writing,,**

 **bnha does not belong to me.**

 **Xxx**

Katsuki Bakugou always hated explosions.

They were loud, flashy things that destroyed everything it caught in its path, breaking them up into tiny little pieces. He'd always associated them with crying and trauma and screams, which stemmed from blurry childhood memories he can't quite place but still sent chills of terror down his spine anyways.

But more than anything else in the world, there was nothing he hated more than Izuku Midoriya.

 _Deku_.

 **Xxx**

"Why does that Midoriya Kid always stare at you? It's kind of creepy, honestly."

The subject that comes up every lunch is brought up once more by one of his classmates (an acquaintance? No, they're just another faceless extra.) - and it grates on Katsuki's wire-thin nerves. He glares into his bottled water, discreetly sneaking a glance at the subject of conversation. Sure enough, there Deku is, in all his glory - a scrawny little shit shoved into a black, loose-hanging middle school uniform, his messy green bangs shadowing his stupid freckled face, a strange scar permanently indented on his forehead and wide emerald orbs. He was blatantly staring at his table again with those wide, owlish eyes that never seemed to leave Katsuki.

"I don't fucking know. It's like having a fucking stalker - I can't go anywhere without him."

And it is, sadly, true; no matter what he's done to him in the past, the nerd has always stayed by his side - suffering through countless hours of bullying and somehow still choosing to stay by Katsuki's side. It hurt at first, to hurt Deku, but now it was all anger and bitterness - because Useless, quirkless Deku, after all the punches and bruises and cuts, still stood; as if to taunt and torment Katsuki in his wake. As if he were looking down on him all this time.

Deku had always made him feel uncomfortable, made his head spin and breath catch in all the wrong places. It was as if he held some mystical power over Katsuki, one that kept him in check through empathy.

Katsuki couldn't stand it.

He listens to all the mindless, usual discussion without much contribution when an unusual voice pipes in, and Katsuki looks up to find the self-proclaimed 'bad boy' of the school; a jet-black haired extra that usually ate silently at their table. But you know what they say - it's always the quiet ones you have to look out for.

"I hear you complaining about him all the time, you know." The extra droned, a bored-looking expression on his face as he cracked his knuckles. "Just do something about it'."

Katsuki furrows his brows at the statement; this is something new - something that stands out amidst the mindless repeat of regular occurence. It's a while before he decides to answer, slightly hesitant. "I've tried everything, though. It's like nothing fazes him."

"Everything?" The jet-black haired boy questioned roughly, a chilling smile stretching across his devil-like face. "Just get rid of him, you know. Scare him off with a warning. And since you're so intolerant of him, why not just let go, whatcha say?" Something about all of it seems off and it puts Katsuki on edge - yet he keeps contemplating the thought, rolling the words around and around in his head.

 _Deku - gone from his life._

 _No more extra footsteps._

 _No more being looking down upon on._

 _No more being_ mocked _._

It is these temptations that drives the agreement to go through with it out of his mouth. The extra sneers and nods before turning away, and Katsuki focuses his attention on his water again, a strange, empty feeling overtaking his stomach.

 **Xxx**

The damn nerd is following him again.

Katsuki can hear the tapping of Deku's trademark bright red sneakers against the sidewalk behind him even with the blaring of traffic and chatter of the passerby. Katsuki tries setting his gaze firmly on the glaring afternoon sun and the busy city streets in front of him, but nothing can cure him of that damn noise - especially not with those pair of eyes trailing every movement of his body-

Don't follow me please.

Go away.

 _I hate you._

"Kacchan? What's wrong? You look kind of bothered." A soft voice inquires, the ghost of a hand hovering above his shoulder.

 _A lot of things, really. And all starts with you, you, YOU._

"It's nothing." Katsuki growls instead, and picks up the pace. He exhales through his nose to keep calm when he hears the oh-so familiar tapping start up again, accompanied by muttering; Shitty nerd was probably taking notes on meaningless things again. The very thought makes his hands curl into stiff fist - the only thing stopping him from beating the shit out of the nerd is the public eye.

Sure, they'd been friends as children, but the distant days of childhood had passed by quickly as they grew. Eventually, Katsuki grew tired of the constant presence of his former childhood friend - and soon started to long for his removal. But no matter what he did - shove him into lockers, hid all his textbooks, even blew up his desk - the nerd never took a hint and kept following him with that nervous smile plastered on his ugly, scarred face.

 _But he'll be gone tomorrow._

 _Breathe._

"Kacchan...we're at your neighborhood..."

Said blonde blinks, dazed for a moment as he gathers his surroundings. Indeed, they had walked into his neighborhood, its neat little houses lined up into neat little rows that he'd always stupidly dreamed about knocking down like dominoes when he was a kid. He nods stiffly, saying nothing as he walks down the neat little stone pathway, eyes set solely on nothing but his front door. Anything to keep from being reminded of the person behind him far away - Deku needed to be tucked into the darkest corner of his mind.

Katsuki thinks he hears a quiet "Bye, Kacchan", but is too busy relinquishing the sound of only one set of footsteps scraping against the stone to pay any mind to it.

 **Xxx**

He falls into an uneasy sleep.

 **Xxx**

"Morning, Kacchan…"

Katsuki ignores the greeting and averts his eyes as he walks. He heaves a sigh of relief when he sees the nerd give up and trail behind him, as he always did. Conversation is out of the question. Not that it ever was, but the weight of what is going to happen crushes Katsuki's chest, doesn't let him speak-

He wants Deku out of his life. He's happy.

 _Right?_

They arrive at the old grey building they call a school. "See you later, Kacchan," Deku says, voice just as friendly as it was all the times he'd said it'd before. He walks into the school building, unexpecting and naive; it would just look to be another normal day for him. Katsuki swallows, eyes trailing after the familiar yellow backpack.

He's better off without you, anyways.

 _It's for the best._

"Later, Deku." He mumbles under his breath, after the boy with the curly green hair and red shoes is long gone.

 **Xxx**

Secretly, Katsuki stays behind after school, hides behind a brick wall. He's initiated a plan with those extras that considered themselves his 'friends', and have come up with a conclusion this lunch period.

He waits, the glaring afternoon sun making him blink. It's about fifteen minutes after school ends when he catches sight of his little group of 'friends', shoving Deku out of the school. He watches as they beat him to the ground, tear his notebooks apart, tell him what a nuisance he is, tell him how much Katsuki despises him and wants him gone-

("It's not true!" Deku insists through his tears, and it stirs something deep inside of Katsuki. "Kacchan wouldn't—Kacchan wouldn't do this—he's a hero-" The rest of his rant is cut off by a harsh hit to his face.)

Katsuki doesn't move. He can't tear his eyes away, even after the gang disbands.

Deku remains. Cut, bruised, torn, broken, but still Deku, limps away from the school after an eternity, with the same scar and eyes and hair and shoes, but there's something different about the way he walks - as if he's curling into himself with each step.

Katsuki's foot catches on the stone sidewalk as he steps back.

Their eyes meet.

The green haired boy stiffens. Slowly, his eyes search his, and there's a long, painful silence. Katsuki waits for the boy to do anything - anything at all; but Izuku Midoriya just starts to turn away without another word, hanging his head in silent acceptance.

No, wait-

I-

"It's true, you know." The words tumble out of Katsuki's mouth before he realizes it. His stomach twists into a painful knot as Deku's face collapses, but it's too late — he keeps talking, spitting out words saturated with pure hatred that he doesn't really mean-

(Or does he?)

Deku flinches with every sentence, as if each and every one of them physically hit him. Wide, emerald orbs go wide with shock before darkening with sorrow, but all Katsuki can see is that damn scar.

It fills him with unadulterated rage.

The green haired boy moves his mouth, incoherent words stumbling out one by one. Katsuki ignores it, too lost in the white noise in his head. "Kill yourself, you useless shit." He spits, fists clenching and unclenching, clenching and unclenching—

"If it makes you happier, Kacchan."

The noise stops.

"...what?"

But he doesn't hear the words again as Deku sprints away. Katsuki watches him leave blankly, wondering why there's a hole in his gut as he heads down the afternoon path he's walked down for two years now. For some reason, each step feels significantly heavier than the other.

(It doesn't help that it's kind of hard to breathe.)

 **Xxx**

He tosses and turns on his bed, the slightest of noises making his eyes snap open. Deku's betrayed gaze and hurt expression keeps him staring up at the flat, white ceiling, his rage filled thoughts rendering him unable to look away.

Deku's fault.

It was all his fault.

 _Don't—don't blame this on me-_

 _HIS FAULT-_

He _hated_ Deku, he _hated_ _him_ -

 _Hated him..._

Katsuki grinds his teeth together and turns away from the ceiling, staring out the window. The stars remind him of freckles, the constellations of that all too familiar scar, and he hastily throws an arm over his eyes, infuriated at himself for thinking about him. He swallows down the bile in his throat, shutting his eyes, and tries vainly to erase the memory of Deku, bruised and beaten, from his mind.

The hollow feeling in his chest doesn't go away, even in his dreams.

 **Xxx**

The next morning, Katsuki holds his breath as he walks towards the little intersection near Deku's apartment where he is usually greeted by the nerd himself. He takes his time getting there, placing one foot in front of the other, dreading the awkward meeting.

He doesn't show. Katsuki exhales, but the tension in his chest only becomes worse.

 **Xxx**

He walks home, exhausted from a day of classes that seems all too long.

(The extras' knowing nudges and hearty laughs as they hear about Deku's absence doesn't help much either. It sickened him to no end.)

He saunters across the bustling city streets shaded by side trees, heading the opposite direction from where he's supposed to go; he can't face his neighborhood now — not with the childhood memories that popped up at every twist and turn. He walks farther and farther, hoping to distract himself from further thinking.

 _Look_. Katsuki chides his brain, directing his attention towards a blonde little boy, playing tag with his dark-haired playmate. _Isn't he being careless?_

"I bet you can't catch me, Colin!"

Katsuki's head pounds. He ducks behind an alleyway to collect his scattered thoughts for a moment when he feels a dull ache start from his lungs, as if he's being filled from the inside out.

"A good host. With a good quirk, too~"

He realizes too late that a villain, in the form of sludge, has inflicted their presence upon him. He's suffocating as he fights against the villain with all he can, palms continuing to smoke and produce explosions and he scans the area, where a small crowd has gathered, hoping for someone, anyone to help him. Seconds delve into minutes, minutes into hours— the pro heroes aren't moving, looking as helpless as Katsuki feels.

"KACCHAN!"

"...Deku?"

Why?

Katsuki can only stare in bewilderment as one figure detaches themselves from the faceless crowd. The lanky boy hurls a yellow backpack at him uselessly, and when that doesn't work, Deku claws desperately at the sludge while Katsuki's hands involuntarily moves towards him, sparks flying-

 _...Why?_

His throat constricts as an explosion lands square in Deku's face, which now sports two matching, twin scars. His breath hitches and he wants to scream at Deku to stop but another ugly explosion sets off, knocking the boy to the ground, his face covered in blood and contorted in pain; those two scars standing outlandishly on his face, one bright red and one dull and fading-

 ** _"Kacchan! Kacchan! Bet you can't catch me!"_**

Deku staggers up, only to let out a guttural moan as he's smashed to the ground again by another giant explosion. Katsuki trues within all his power to restrain his hands, to rein in his explosions, but he's growing tired and his lungs hurt-

"Stop it!" He screams as Deku gets up again with those two scars, a trembling smile decorating his face. " _STOP IT_!"

The green haired boy charges forward again, determination flashing in his eyes as he prepares for another barrage. "Feeling suicidal?" The sludge villain asks, and Katsuki feels his heart drop into his gut as he watches Deku, bleeding and tattered, dodge another explosion.

 _No. Stop, stop-_

 _Don't come after me-_

 _Stay down-_

 _I_ hate _you so much-_

 _I-_

The villain's— no, Katsuki's hand flies towards Deku's face, towards the twin scars and the wide doe eyes and the freckles and releases. A burst of wind. Heat. Fire. Smoke.

That's all it takes for Deku to collapse to the floor in a lifeless heap.

 ** _"D-don't worry, Kacchan! I am here!"_**

Katsuki's head bursts into a wide array of memories and emotions and unspoken words.

 _I hate you!_ You make my heart ache with guilt.

 _I hate your stupid face!_ I miss you.

 _I want you gone!_ Come back.

 _Just leave and die!_ Never go.

A gust of wind blows, a strong arm grabs his wrist, and it's over as quick as it began. Katsuki should feel relief, but he feels only dread as he stares in disbelief at Deku's limp, broken body.

(And you did this to him.)

 _Shut up, shut up-_

"Deku...shitty nerd... _wake up_..."

"Kacchan...?" Deku gasped softly, green orbs open and searching but not focusing on anything. Katsuki swallows back a sob as he crouched over the green haired boy's body, vaguely aware of the shouting and protests behind him. He tunes all the other noise out, focusing his gaze on nothing but the boy he despised so much hours prior.

"Why did you have to go and do that, huh? Why...?" His voice trails off weakly, strained by the beginning of a sob. Katsuki feels something wet on his cheek and he wonders when it started raining before Deku's quivering, thin fingers brush away the droplets and he realizes; _oh. They're tears._

"I promised." The boy with the twin scars breathes, a lopsided grin etched across his beaten face. "Did you see that? I saved Kacchan."

"I know, I know, please, just save your breath, the _medics_ -"

"I saved Kacchan." Deku mumbles again, quieter this time. "L-like I promised I would. I really did."

His breaths become more ragged, more labored, and Katsuki can't do anything but clutch Deku's limp hand as the medics hustle over. Their shoulders slump as they examine the boy on the ground and the blonde struggles to breathe as he watches Deku slowly fade away.

(Funny. He's not the one who was bullied by his childhood friend and then killed for him. But for some reason, his chest seems to hurt more than Deku's burn scars and newly formed injuries.)

"Deku..." Katsuki struggles to say, his hands clutching at his own uniform, tears slipping down his face and falling onto Deku, shattering like broken glass. The green haired boy squeezes his hand weakly, half-lidded eyes looking off into the distance.

"Sorry...I'm so sorry...sorry, sorry sorry, sorry, sorry _sorry_ -" His voice raises hysterically as he watches the rise and fall of Deku's chest get weaker and weaker. Even long after he's dragged away from the scene, he utters the words continuously under his breath like the remnants of a broken prayer.

 **Xxx**

 _"Kacchan! Kacchan! Bet you can't catch me!"_

 _"You bet your ass I will!" Even at the little age of four, Katsuki was a foul mouthed kid (thanks to his mother's explosive attitude.). He chased Deku around the front yard, a bead of sweat rolling off his forehead as a result of the hot summer day-_

 _And he feels it. A tingling in his palm as he grabs at Deku's face, and-_

 _There's a loud sound. Colorful, orange sparks dances across his palm, almost like he's lighting up firecrackers. He lifts his head and is about to tell Deku all about his new discovery - his quirk? - when he realizes that the other boy is down, smoke curling up from a-_

 _Katsuki's face pales._

 _There's a giant, ugly mark going straight from Deku's forehead down to the top of his left eye - red and singed and smoking—the blonde can't do anything in that moment but scream as he watches smoke curl off his friend's broken face-_

 _All the commotion catches the attention of Katsuki's mother, and soon enough they're rushing Deku to the ER and there's noise and a blur of colors but all Katsuki can focus on is Deku's face, that giant, ugly burn-_

 _"D-don't worry, Kacchan! I am here!" Deku exclaims, once he is bandaged up and seemingly fine, except Katsuki knows that under the bandages, there's a irremovable mark on his skin, put there by Katsuki himself-_

 _"I'll protect you! Please stop crying, I'm alright…"_

 _Katsuki doesn't even realize he's crying until Deku brings it up, and he wipes at his eyes with the backs of his hands._

 _"...Promise?" He asks meekly after a while, clinging on to Deku's hand._

 _"Promise." The small, freckled boy squeezes his hand in a reassuring manner._

 _Katsuki squeezes back._


End file.
